The Junkyard
encouraging Lex's world domination since 2001
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The Junkyard encouraging Lex's world domination since 2001 |
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livejournal Entries For the Week
the great phone hunt Current Challenges in Progress
Isilya's Snugglefic Challenge The Lex/Clark Emails
email to Clark #4 by Te Smallville Archives
Smallville Slash Archive Other Links
WRFA Lists
ClarkLex People Who Think a Lot
LJ friends list Fanfic Quick Links
Mustang Sally and Rivka T's Disenchanted Kingdom Quote
If you don't send me feedback, I will sob uncontrollably for hours on end, until finally, in a fit of depression, I slash my wrists and bleed out on the bathroom floor. My death will be on your heads. Murderers. I'm willing to accept vampires and mutants and aliens and gay chocolate milk giving cows, but human males do not get pregnant and they do not give birth! That's why he goes bad, you know -- all the good people hit him on the head or try to shoot him and constantly mistrust him, while there's this vast cohort of minions saying, "We wouldn't hurt you, Lex, and we'll give you power and greatness and oh so much sex..." "Pay-off for seedy ex-doctor to sew up bullet hole in your Krypto-Mutant Witness... one brown bag (containing an undetermined number of unmarked, non-sequentially numbered $100 bills, peyote, or both)" Obi-Wan has a sort of desperate, pathetic patience in this movie. You can just see it in his eyes: "My padawan is a psychopath, and no one will believe me; I'm barely keeping him under control and expect to wake up any night now to find him standing over my bed with a knife!" Is there anything that says, "Yes, I am a virgin, and all my beta-readers are, too," like...boiling ejaculate? Hot, scalding sperm? Burning seminal fluid? ...let's face it, with all that's happened to him this season, it's a wonder he's not spending every evening out behind the castle, drinking Night Train and shooting at squirrels..." "Welcome to ClarkLex. This is the list for people who watch Smallville mainly 'cause it's gay as a picnic basket. Yes, Smallville, starring Clark "Gayer than a leather pinata" Kent and Lex "Gay as Christmas at Bloomingdale's" Luthor, as two gay homosexuals who love each other, and did we mention they're gay?" Fic Quotes "Wait... wait... are you saying you're an alien?" "I mean, it's not every day that you get to come out as an alien. And gay. A big, gay alien."
So, you're going to get Clark the girl of his dreams, since that's less morally suspect than giving
him a truck. You're like the Make A Wish Foundation gone terribly, terribly wrong."
"It's not like we're trading blowjobs for chicken nuggets here."
"I was poisoned, Lex. Semen is the only antidote." "I did NOT fund research into the animation of dessert foods!"
"Clark, we're in a ditch with a stalled engine and two flat tires. In the *snow*. How could it be worse?"
There's just something about a man who's seven months pregnant and wearing a pair of custom made overalls and a white t-shirt with a nursing bra underneath.
The catering idea, of course, had been nixed almost immediately. Jor-El said that there was a great deal of feasting and partying on the day of the Dorzin Marjin, but that was Krypton, this was Kansas. Lex couldn't see this as a crudite and caviar on toast points event, even in Smallville. Though he did order a few bottles of good champagne, just because it seemed the thing to do; the odds seemed pretty high that someone in the Kent house would have to be drunk at some point, either in the before, the during, or the after. Virgin ass at seven, cocktails at eight, and homemade muffins for breakfast seemed very civilized and keeping in the spirit of the whole ass hymen ritual. Diaryland Archive ficlets, wips, and drafts
Something Like Forgetting 1 |
lemon hummus -- 2002-06-09 Gah. It's been one of those days. Or rather, yesterday was, which is so highly uninteresting to most that I won't bore anyone with the details. But. Interesting damn day. I've been mulling more WiPs, especially since people are reading the snippets in the diary (WHEN did that start happening?) and asking questions about Damaged, and I really want to work on it, except, well, teh entire storyline was heavily Jossed awhile back, so I'd have to basically start from scratch. Not necessarily a bad idea, except the idea of starting another Very Long Story scares the bejeebers out of me. Fandom Value Quotients Some people are just as bored as I am. *g* Henry Jones 8.166 Khaki 7.12 Kathe 8.5 Rosenho 7.36 Catmoran 6.666666 Victoria P 8.44 I've also been looking very, very hard for some ClarkLex fic I need to rec and I made a list and lost it. Lost as in, it's on my hard drive, but not under any name or in any folder I know of. This is pretty common for me--I hit save very fast and write in a name and forget where I saved and what I saved it under. I later refer to these incidents as An Adventure, as I will run across them at strange times, like when looking for my essays or a MP3 or a grapic of some kind. Tara Blue sent me the new graphics for my site. I'm still writing out the HTML code for some stories (there's a really GOOD chance X-Men is going to be skipped for now, NINETY FOUR STORIES, Geez), so expect the update this week sometime. Now, the hummus article. We've all done our homework and read it, right? Good, good, because if you haven't, you really REALLY should, like, now. Lecture on the contents begins now. Or not. *g* Okay, what I like about it. Earlier this week I pointed out that fanfic, like all forms of consumer goods, goes through cycles, or fads, in which one kind of story gets domination over all other kinds, and pointed out that usually, the market turns over and the fads change. I know that doesn't help if you posted your particular CLex friendship story during the Great PWP Challenge of Whenever, but it should bring some comfort that it wasn't because your story wasn't good, but becuase it wasn't lemon-garlic hummus. (and am I the only one who has never, ever eaten hummus?) Anyway. One of the dangers for writers, and I include pro writers in this one, is the Pit of Stagnation. You find a storyline, style, and voice you're comfortable with, that you enjoy, and that other people take well, and you wallow there until the moss grows over you so thick you'd need a blowtorch to find your way out again. Now, granted, there ARE only seven or so plots on earth, according to my last lit professor. There ARE only so many ways to get CLex together, and no one is arguing that there are too many of those. But. That does not mean that we need to become formulatic about it either. Lemon-garlic hummus people. We all like it, but man cannot live on lemon-garlic hummus alone or we burn out on fandoms faster than you can snap your fingers. There are several authors I could cite as the most flexible in terms of storyline and style, voice and genre, but if you read my diary, you already know who they are, and if you read extensively in CLex, you probably are aware of them anyway. And right, you may not LIKE every one of their stories, but you also will never, ever mistake them for hummus. Take a risk, for God's sake. I'm not talking about pulling out the medieval torture devices or planning the SuperAngstBunnies, because a constant stream of angst is very, very boring. I'm not saying give up on any one genre, and no, I'm very good with lemon-flavored hummus myself, in the metaphorical sense, as apparently, I have never eaten the actual stuff. But. If you made your reputation on humorous PWPs, snap out a character exploration. If you are well known for your wonderful plotted epics, trot out a light and fluffy little CLexian confection. If all you write is Jaded!Lex, put the boy in the middle of a day at the zoo. Okay, I just laughed myself into a hernia with that one, but you get my drift. Never stagnate. Work against trend. Open up to the possibilities that are out there still, because God, there ARE so damn many. AU if you have to. AU to the point of sheer denial if you have to. Kill Jonathan Kent. Okay, I encourage this trend big time. Seduce a pretty boy you met over the weekend--oh, no, that's ME. God, I'm connecting with Lex today big time. *sighs* God, I'm bored. jenn email-- 12:43 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope recs and alpha!Lizzy -- 2002-06-07 Oh so much news. First off, let's all mull the fun of search engines. Our pick of the week? *dum dum dum* horse semen video tape And I thought dental porn was as low as I could go.... Recs are good. Recs are VERY good. The Unexpected VI: Evolution by zahra, who continues her quest to make all of CLexdom her slaves, and it's working. Wonderful. Beautiful. GOOD. Satellite of Love by Shrift, who has managed to make me drool on my poor abused keyboard. Beautiful, wonderful, lovely, with this line to make ANYONE stop breathing.... "You have big hands," Lex said, biting Clark's ear. "Do us both." What do you MEAN you haven't read it? Shoo! Go! Now, for Hysterical Personal Moment, because, trust me, this has been an amazingly fun morning. We had a Cops (TM) moment at the house today, in which two people tried to steal my father's equiptment out of his van in broad daylight. He's a professional contractor, so what they were trying to get away with was around a one or two thousnad dollars worth of spray rigs, nail guns, you get the idea. Normally, we'd all say, um, stupid much? Don't, it gets better. My SISTER was here. You'd need to know my sister. She's blonde and about five six, looks very, very fragile, twenty-two years old. She's very slim, very, very feminine, and looks like you could break her over her knee without breaking a sweat. She's delicate. Sweet. You can make her cry if you say mean things to her. She has a thing for pink and pastel colors. She wears high heels a lot. Here's an image. Think--antebellum. Think--Gone With the Wind. Think--soft. That's my outer sister. My inner sister is a six five prison bitch with tattoos and a propensity for axes and blunt instruments. The Inner Lizzy got out big time. Not a pretty sight. This is the girl who can go to Mardi Gras and breaks the foot of the first guy who tries to touch her. This is the girl who, when her exboyfriend threatened her, coolly got in her car, started the engine, and made it clear that he would be out of her way either on the ground beneath the car or thrown over the hood, and the only thing that worried her was whether he'd pay to get her car detailed afterward. He moved, by the way. This is the girl who, WHILE HER APPENDIX WAS RUPTURING, was curious as to whether she really really needed morphine, since she doesn't like to be out of it. I like her ALOT. Anyway, Lizzy goes outside to deal with the situation. The language level was astounding. The two would-be thieves removed themselves from the premises, sans penises, while she coolly talked on the phone to the police and gave them a point by point description of where they were on the road, their truck's description, their appearances (and she's GOOD with details), along with some choice commentary. The only thing that stopped her from following them was the fact it was near time for my niece to be fed and Lizzy wasn't sure it was a good idea to drive and breastfeed. Honestly, I'm not sure that would have actuallly stopped her if she hadn't been sure the police would catch the would-be thieves. Unfortunately, they weren't caught. To put this in perspective, we KNOW the would-be thieves pretty well and there's a long story involved in how they decided that stealing in broad daylight was a good idea. Huh. Darwin Moment. Ah, rural life. *smiles* So. My Hero is my sister. More later when I can stop glowing at Alpha!Lizzy. jenn, really damn amused email-- 12:55 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope logan/rogue ficlet -- 2002-06-07 L/R movieverse snippet. Posted for Khaki and Victoria. You both make me smile a lot. Also--Scott/Logan movieverse ficletish thing. Yes, I'm being reminded of what i left behind. ***** She was curled like a cat in the downstairs window seat, almost asleep, warm sunlight pouring over arms and long bare legs braced loosely against the opposite wall. In the terms of her place in the school, she looked more ordinary than any of them, newly cut hair dangling in her face, wrapped in a long-sleeve buttoned shirt and short gloves, book in hand like any student. A casual observer probably would never have connected her to the dossier on file with most of the known major intelligence agencies in the world and all of the unknown ones. And no one knew that better than Marie herself, who enjoyed the interesting paradox she always made, so utterly ordinary to look at and rated as one of the most dangerous mutants on the planet to date, just by exposing an inch of skin. She could get used to that ,and twirling her fingers through her hair, she grinned a little as she read. "Marie." It was customary to keep a few steps away from her when startling her--reflexes and strength weren't quite so powerful as some, but they tended to be on the lightest trigger, and she spun into defense automatically, one glove off and balanced lightly on the balls of her feet. Two reasons--friends might accidentally come in contact with her skin--enemies needed to go down fast, because she didn't have the physical stamina to withstand an extended assault and her mutation was damned useless in a combat situation unless she was interested in practicing schizophrenia for a few days or weeks, depending on length of contact. "Fuck it, baby, you scared me," she muttered and sat back down, drawing her legs up to her chest, book forgotten. "When'd you get back?" Logan shrugged when he sat down and pulled one of her legs toward him, rubbing a gloved hand absently over her calf. "A few hours ago. Chuck debriefed me and let me go. You wanna go get something to eat?" She grinned and extended her gloved hand. "That's all I get after a month absence? Dinner?" "And you showed so much enthusiasm to see me again." Without preamble, he pulled her leg, and with a gasp, Marie found herself on her back with the considerable weight of a softly growling Logan pinning her down. "I can do better." "You could try." And she grinned up, keeping her bare hand resting on top of his jacket. "I need to change clothes." "Or put some on." "That too." Stretching a leg out, she curved it around his calf and drew him closer, taking a long breath at the brush of wet heat against her shoulder. "You said dinner." "I say a lot of things. Doesn't mean anything." A mumble against her collar, and the hand on her thigh slid back up her hip and stopped abruptly. "Shit, Marie, what kind of shorts are these?" "Cut-offs--I ruined another pair of jeans in the garden." She grinned softly. "The Professor said you'd be home. I wanted to surprise you." She opened her eyes. "Logan, anyone can walk in here--why don't we--" And with a grin that made her catch her breath, he pulled them both up, sliding her down on his lap, the toes of one foot barely brushing the floor while he fingered the buttons of her shirt absently. "Scooter just got back too, baby, and trust me, he and Jeanie didn't look like they were comin' out anytime soon." "There's--" "No bra either." He smirked and Marie realized he'd unbuttoned her almost to the waist. Slapping a hand over her chest, she tried to get up and hands caught her hips, pinning her down. "You're feeling adventurous today." A breath against the exposed skin of her chest when his hands slid up her back, pulling her closer. "I like it. This my shirt?" "Yeah. You weren't here and you didn't take them with you." "Looks better on you anyway." A nip on her covered shoulder, a gloved hand sliding into her shirt and she caught her breath, tilting her head back. "Logan," she murmured. "Anyone could see--" Logan lifted his head and grinned. "I'll tell 'em to go away." ***** Just me being cute. *grins* jenn email-- 12:39 a.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope value and blog netiquette -- 2002-06-06 The Fandom Value Quotients are rolling in! *grins* Since I have permission from several, I'll post them when I have a few more for a good sampling. And Victoria P is more valuable than me in Smallville! *sulks* She's VERY lucky I like her. Speaking of herself.... Victoria P talks netiquette and the blog/lj phenomenon and has some great, great links to other interesting articles on the subject. I've been mulling the entire private/public policy of LJ and blogs, because it's actually become an issue. That people will abuse for their own ends. It's--rather depressing, come to think, but I have a feeling this isn't deliberate misinterpretation of simple netiquette, but, as Victoria and her links seem to imply, a circumstance where carelessness and simple ignorance contribute to what could be percieved as extremely bad manners if not outright hostility. The part that's most important, that I'm not sure any of these entries have covered, is the concept of context. If you're part of the LJ/Blog thing, you understand how very, VERY fragmented cross-blog arguments can get--there's a REASON we all tend to find a central person/area to link back to, instead of linking to everyone's opinion on the subject. I usually use Victoria P or LaT or Raincitygirl as my main link-back, just to make life that much easier. During the Muse Debates, it got nightmarishly complex if you weren't following from the beginning of the discussion. Not to mention confusing as hell. That's one of the many reasons I started using the hyperlinks to organize my diary, so people could find the context of any given argument far easier As many people have stated, LJs and blogs are public, therefore quotable anywhere. That's not in dispute exactly--technically, anytime anyone sends me any kind of email, private or public, I can quote it anywhere I want to, in and out of context, cut into whatever form works best for my argument. I don't. Even though I can. It's bad manners, it's a bad precedent, and it's vulgar. Here's why context is important. EXAMPLE FEEDBACK This feedback is from a close friend. Keep that in mind. You are one sick chick [...] Now, flat out, that looks remarkably like a flame. Easy for me to do, right? Cut the worst out, toss it into the public. If I said this was Mary Kate from Tinbuktu, not someone I knew very well, this might look VERY bad. Now, put it in context. *snicker* You are one sick chick, and I mean it in the nicest way. I will, I hope, be able to remove the image of Rogue calling Logan "Daddy" from my head sometime this century, not to mention Logan's penis's, er, thoughts... like the little schoolgirl costume, though... (By the way--the story was On a Man and His Penis, my penis point of view fic. Don't ask.) That is the complete feedback sent to me. See how easy that was? Not only that, this person IS a friend, so she CAN write her feedback how she pleases and I know how to interpret it BECAUSE we're friends. God knows, after a year and a half of acquaintance, it'd be sad if we couldn't read each other decently. This is an extreme example--I can't imagine anyone with a sense of fair play would do anything like this, but that doesn't mean it doesn't happen. One of the biggest sins currently running through the blogland/LJ thing is that we're not being as careful as we could be quoting IN context and specific entry as well as the quote that makes us so interested, complete with link TO the entry in question. This is especially true with the beginnings of Bulletin Board references to blogs and LJs. Simple common sense tells me personally that if I quote Victoria's blog, I provide a link to what I took, especially if I'm removing a particular section to mull on my diary. Also good manners and honesty in what I'm doing. I try to make sure when I do quote people that I HAVE the entry for anyone who reads this diary (and wow, there are ALOT of you, btw. I had no idea). That way, the fairest representation of the author's words is taken. To get more on the subject of courtesy on the net, blogs, LJs, and so forth, read Victoria, Black Rose, LuckyKitty, and Kemayo, which ALL make some valid points. jenn email-- 2:24 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope advanced masochism 3 -- 2002-06-06 I'm a fool for bad humor. Advanced Masochism 101: The Lolita Complex. It's Beth's fault. And Hope's. Just remember that. jenn email-- 1:04 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope value, recs, blogs, undone -- 2002-06-06 So people have been telling me their Fandom Value Quotient. With the permission of the authors, I'll put up a list. It was also pointed out by Khaki that I missed a category--the Plot-Driven Action Fic. Like poetry, filk, and haiku, I so rarely read it that I cannot assign it a Fandom Value number. But. Let's drop them all at six, because it's jenn's Fandom Value Scale and being jenn, I can decide these things. *grins* I REALLY need more hobbies. I could make this into a quiz. No idea HOW, but it could happen. How--scary. A few recs for your reading pleasure. Lazarus Kiss by Hope, who is on a ROLL of beautiful fic. Read, read, read. Gorgeous prose, deliciously edgy moment, and sex like this.... Whoa. Distance by Pearl-o. Lovely, lovely boys and sexual introspection. The usual beautiful lyrical style and you WILL enjoy. The Unexpected Part IV by zahra, who continues this delightfully adorable Lex POV series and oh, this is FUN! *dances* Pretty fics, pretty fics. Victoria talks about the proliferation of blogs and brings up the point--Smallville is rife with bloggers. Stuffed with them. You cannot throw a stone but to hit a person with a blog. Or five, if your aim is good. Mine is. Smallville has a big blog population. Or bloggy people have been attracted to Smallville, and it IS sort of interesting--not that I keep up all that much outside my fandom and Daily LJ/Blog Rounds. But doing the terrifying friendsfriends thing, I'm noticing a heavy leaning toward the RPS and Smallville people as a rule on fannish blogs. Lots of Buffy/Angel, too, but serious overlap since many Smallville writers also watch/read/write that fandom as well. LOTS of N'Sync. I mean, A LOT of it. Harry Potter. But it does seem like anyone with a posted story in Smallvile has a blog. On the Wolverine/Rogue front, picked up four really GOOD stories by sheerest accident when a writer I vaguely knew from movieverse posted to Smallville. Since I'm now very aware that some bored movieverse writers wander through here for--I have no idea what--these are for you. *smiles* Also for Khaki (good call on the hummus) and Victoria, since they both read/write movieverse and I think, if they haven't seen these before, they'll like them very much. X-Men the Movie Fanfic by Morgan Inviolate was posted to either WaR, XMMFF, LoganMarie or WRBeta, not sure which. I'm leaning toward XMMFF. But it's a totally new Carol Danvers interpretation and like NOTHING I ever expected. Very dark, very beautiful. Details and Common Place as well was posted to XMMFF and they are stunningly lovely. The one I hadn't seen before was Vernacular, which is one of the most fascinating Rogue and Jean characterizations in history. With all the Jean bashing done, I think fanfic writers sometimes forget how much the two women have in common with their powers. Anyway, even if you've seen them before, all four are worth a serious read-through. All short, sweet, and lovely. Now that I can be sure everyone's actually read Undone by Hope, I can gush. I have been WAITING for this story forever. Early on--God, around the second episode at the death of Bugboy--I got seriously obsessed with the idea of Clark accidentally killing someone and figured even back then that Lex would cover for it. The episode Zero proved me absolutely right. Hell, the episode Hug proved Lex would take in criminals and pay to have them fixed up on Clark's say-so. I'm guessing that Clark called Lex to pick them up after Kyle was shot too, so hey, I'm highly amused. So, Hope did it, took the idea into a classy, almost noir feeling, and this is why I love this story. Like Te, Hope has an extremely unique style--I can pick it out anywhere, flow and style and wordchoice, and she chooses her subjects to best reflect the absolute best of that style. This was a magnificent example of a perfect story--not a note wrong, not a flaw to be seen, clean lines of prose and development, wonderful characterization, and I can go on like this for YEARS. The entire premise was so unforced that it flowed like water. There was a sense of inevitability on how everything turned out--I never felt like the writer had to MAKE things happen, but simply let it open up with perfect naturalness. I'm rarely at a loss for words where really good fiction is concerned, but here I--really am. You just don't get THIS kind of writer often enough NOT to gush and coddle and spoil as much as possible in hopes she'll stay around. jenn email-- 11:48 a.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope hummus essay -- 2002-06-05 To the following brilliant minds.... Khaki, Jayne, and Katherine for the link to the Hummus essay. Slash Fiction Is Like a Banquet Read. Understand. Enjoy. Sig file, if possible. Bookmark. It's a DAMN good essay. Because I cannot leave anything alone, I may go over some points I especially liked tomorrow. After I giggle my ass off at my Fandom Value, that is. I REALLY need more to do. jenn, trippy email-- 10:43 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope jenn's scale of fandom value -- 2002-06-05 Somewhere in the world is this huge essay that involves fanfic and hummus and a banquet hall, and I could swear Tara LJC had something to do with it. It's deeply metaphorical, and, if you like hummus, you're going to want some before you finish reading. It's also ACCURATE as hell. If I can find it, I'm linking. Someone else has to have read this and they should really, really tell me where it is. Anyway, today's thing--instead of defending any One Single Genre's Fandom Value, I'm going to do the really fun thing and defend every damn one of them. It boils down to the phases fanfic goes through, in a way, but mostly the way that we all gather like hyenas around a corpse when something new and shiny comes our way. When the fandom is in the middle of a PWP kick, a brand new plotted darkfic becomes our roadkill of choice, in a manner of speaking. When we're all dizzy from about half a dozen deep, richly plotted wonders, we toss ourselves blindly toward smutty humor like we haven't eaten in years. It's trend and style and it's also supply and demand. It's almost mathematical. This is one of the many, many reasons I rarely say I don't like a category of fic. It just isn't going to be true all the time. Even deathfic, which I have an absolute horror of, has in fact been my fic of choice at times when I need it. What we don't have in fandom is anything like widespread accurate descriptions of our terminology. Even the MPAA rating, while widely accepted, is misused by some authors (there's a reason I generally either rate PG-13 = no sex or NC-17 = there is sex). We say darkfic, fluffyfic, happyfic, etc forever, but if I went though the SSA and asked everyone to vote where a story would end up, we'd be torn six ways from Sunday on how it goes in. How DO you cut and dry the Humorous PWP? The Angsty Plotted With Happy Ending? The Character Study With a Small Side of Masturbation at the End? Tricky, tricky stuff sometimes. But. Seriously. We need ALL these categories, even when we think we don't. Happyfic reminds us of hope--and in CLex, God knows, we need it. Darkfic makes us re-examine the characters we think we know. Humorfic helps us remember why we really enjoy them. Sillyfic lets us play. Fluffyfic makes us grin. PWP--do you want me to explain THAT one? Which is why I sort of regret putting my value scale up last entry. I do like the Plotted, Richly Textured, Character-Driven Fics the best. A steady diet of those would send me screaming toward a psych ward for a custom jacket and crayolas to write home, but I do love them. What I don't know for sure is if it really has a higher value. If I assign it a ten and say that PWPs are worth five, and we can all go out and count up our writing and find out our average value to the fandom. I did say this was mathematical, right? So. Let's do it like this. Jenn's Scale of Fandom Value, simplified Character-Driven Plotted Fics =10 And since this is Jenn's, I don't have to count poetry, haiku, or meta. Because I'm Arrogant. *g* a-g represent the number of fics per category you have written, while Z represents your Rough Value Score. Divide your Rough Value Score by Y, the Total Number of Fictions you have written. So the equation will look something like this. 10(a) + 9(b) + 8(c) + 7(d) + 5(e) + 3(f) + 1(g)= Z Z / Y = Your Value Quotient to the Fandom. So.... 10(1) + 9(12) + 8(3) + 7(3) + 5(3) + 3(2) + 1(0)= 195 195 / 24 = 8.125 My Rough Value Score is 195 My Number of Fictions is 24 My Fandom Value Quotient is 8.125 I fudged on a couple of the humor/PWPs to jump my score higher. What, did I say I was fair here? There's a good chance that math is off--I had to do it in my head since I'm in a rush. Now, to do a true and accurate representation of my ACTUAL Fandom Value, as opposed to my Fandom Value Quotient, this formula would need to be applied to ALL writers in the fandom, then divided to get the Average Fandom Value. Then your Fandom Value Quotient would be placed on a scale in relation to the Average Fandom Value. Then you would have your ACTUAL Fandom Value as a writer. When we get tired of this, we can THEN go to doing OTHER fandoms, finding out THEIR Average Fandom Value and compare it to OUR Average Fandom Value. Or, you know, I could laugh my ass off that I just wrote all that and really, really enjoy everything. God, I need more to do. jenn email-- 8:01 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope fictional categorization -- 2002-06-05 I am rant-free. It's just amazing. There is--no new gratiutious Lex abuse, unless you count some of the fanfic on ff.net, which I am avoiding. There is--In which the glorious LaT is back to defend Clark, which is good, because she reminds me that I DO love him on some level that I need to access more often. I've missed you, chica. *smiles and hugs* I've been mulling darkfic. On one list, they're currently coming up with a working definition of fluffy-fic, and then in Smallville, it's darkfic. It's actually pretty cool, since I'm laid back in how I define what I read, or how I define why I read what I read, or how far I can meta myself into a hole. You get the idea. Anyway. I don't write it often. Angst? Yes, God yes, angst makes me happy, but I'm happy-ending-writing girl for the most part. I don't even bother with story ideas that don't have a way toward something of a happy ending (witness the fact that Illusions is still stuck). This is especially true in series, since concievably in any one I write, I can always write out a reasonable happy ending somehow if I ever feel like it. So the darkfic thing is a new development for me as a writer--not just darkfic, but the non-redeemable kind. The kind where I squirm afterward and the kind where I'm aware that there's no possible way this can turn out well, and I know this from the beginning. It's--new. And interesting. I'm not sure I even dislike it that much--I always like when I find something new I can manage to do. There's so damn few times anyone surprises themselves as writers, finds a new place in themselves that they get to try out for the first time, and I can count them all--first slash (Heels, first deathficTo Listen, first femslash Gently, Softly, first sex scene In the Space of Seven Days, first novel In the Space of Seven Days, first fanfic Manipulation. They're all there and accounted for, and I remember every story that was a first for me--what I did to write it, the music, the mindset, the people I discussed it with, and how I changed while writing it. It's--well, pretty cool. But the development of a taste for darkfic--that I didn't expect. I'd blame Te mostly, because it's extremely fashionable to blame Te (*g*), but it's also the desire not to rewrite myself eighty thousand times. Change is inevitable or there's stagnation. It's not that I start out thinking, ah, I must write this kind of story, let's find an idea that works. It's when the right idea hits and lingers and takes up residence, I don't ignore it or try to bend it the way I think it SHOULD be, but let it develop how it's supposed to be. That's--REALLY new, and it's the first time I'm not fighting myself through the storyline. Very cool, personally. So Dust is, in its own way, an unqualified personal success, that I broke with my inclinations and let it happen the way the story was supposed to go, not how I wanted it to go. mmmm. But, let's go to fic types in general. Darkfic is called ALOT of things, and usually erronously and often degradingly. Shockfic is the biggest misuse, though I rate shockfic on an entirely different level than true darkfic. There's a very, very strong desire among writers to rate the types of story by their value or importance--ie humor is less important/easier/lightweight compared to, say angst, or PWP is easier/lighter/whatever than character studies. And in everyone's head, we have the list, and most of the time, we all err to the side of thinking that Angst Equals More Serious and More Effort, while Happy Equals Easy and Light. Which isn't entirely true, I think. I think most of us can agree that a PWP probably takes less out of the writer than, say, that three hundred page epic that spans twenty years of Clark's life and studies his every move. I'm with you there. I'm definitely with that, but the one thing I think we all forget to factor in is the difference between writers and their personal strengths AS writers, not to mention the value of the story to the reader herself, AND, this is the big one, how much HARDER some genres are to write. Examples--good humor is hard to write, and if it looks effortless, that means the writer did their job. The more effortless and organic it looks, the more likely it is that the writer not only knew what they were doing, but took pains to make absolutely sure it worked on every level. And let's face it, in-character humorfic is rare as hell. Sillyfic is far more likely to be found than true humor, and mistaking the two is a mistake. Sillyfic is NOT in the same category. Sillyfic I can write in five minutes with no effort whatsoever, will be funny and not all at in character or particularly interesting outside of the fact it makes someone giggle. Good humorfic is something that someone like Beth with Expectations (which I think of as true Humorfic, taking a silly situation and making humor from it) or Wendi or God, about a dozen authors who slave to make it seem perfectly natural for the characters to act in hysterically funny ways. That's a gift, and an art, and it seriously kicks ass all over the place when it comes out well. The biggest tendency in the fanfic world is not ONLY to categorize, but also to rate said categories, as stated above, by the worthiness of the fic in question in the Value Scale of Fiction. Sort of funny if you think about it too long. In the usual listing, the Plotted Angst Story will get a top spot over the Humorous Plotted Story or the Humorous PWP, or the Character Study Story. I'm still working out how exactly I'd value-rate stories--I'm too mood-driven, because everything, for me, is subject to change depending on what the Inner Jenn needs. It's more likely that a Plotted Angst Story will blow my mind in a variety of ways (see Past Grief, Demarcation, Chrysalis, Prophets of Eden). There's a reason I have GROUPS of favorite stories, not single favorite stories. But anyway. For what it's worth, here's my Personal Value Scale, purely subjective, and only really including what I actually read. So on here, nothing in the poetry family is to be seen--I just don't read it. Not a value judgement, just a personal choice. Poetry is very valuable, but rating it when I don't read it would be terribly unfair. Plotted Character Driven Stories Humor Stories | Character Studies | Relationship Stories (romantic and friend-only) PWP Sillyfic I also don't differentiate between het, gen, and slash in the above. Any of these can fit into any of those, and it's a purely artificial barrier to split anything by who is having sex or isn't having sex with what sex. In a manner of speaking. And say THAT five times fast. A breakdown in the top category might be necessary, but not really. We can split it down a dozen different ways, but for the record, happy or depressing ending, the top level of stories are the ones that make us THINK, EXAMINE, and these we REMEMBER. Sit down, re-examine what we know about the characters as they react in an entirely new situation, and for me personally, are among the most fun to read. I'm perfectly content to be haunted for weeks or months by a fic, no matter how it goes, because that means the author did exactly what they set out to do. I'm going to mull further before going into my Defense of Happyfic, Defense of Darkfic, and Defense of the PWP as Legitimate Genres of Writing. *grins* Any questions? jenn, merrily email-- 12:10 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope expectations 8! the funny! -- 2002-06-05 *wheezing* You. Have. To. Read. This. Weddings! Lexine! Muumuus! Poi jokes! Gay platitudes! And The Blonde! You're sooo not gonna want to miss this. jenn, still on the floor laughing email-- 12:42 a.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope sleep while i drive, yes, more -- 2002-06-04 *breathes* Still recovering from Undone. What, you haven't read it yet? GO GO! So. To cheer myself up. To the usual suspects--Wendi, Andy, Hope, and Bethy, for being inspirational, supportive, sweet, and writing incredibly good, good fic. Tara for the pic that was open AT ALL TIMES. *smiles* jenn 
I couldnt' help it! It's sooo pretty. email-- 10:30 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope emergency rec session -- 2002-06-04 Undone by Hope. I can't--can't possibly describe how…I really can't without spoiling and this story, above all others, should NEVER be spoiled. It MUST be read and if you aren't reading it, you should be. Now. Right now. Read now. It will teach you an entire new meaning of hurt. It's--breathtaking. So absolutely perfect that it's aweing. My GOD. Expectations 7 (2/2) by Beth. Hee. Fun times five. Babies, The Blonde, Hawaii--fall in love. LOVE BETH! *hugs* Air by Pearl-0. Beautiful, lyrical CLexness like a breath of air during a storm. Stunning. Sex and Candy by Wendi. Okay, this is FUN. You have to read and love and read again and I NEED to see Sorority Boys now. It's not strictly CLex, sort of, but...trust me. GOOD. VERY GOOD. Will help you through the shakes of Undone a little. Really. Wow. I'm going to go find a paper bag to breathe into for awhile. Thank you, Hope. *breathless* jenn email-- 1:34 a.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope did it! did it! did it! -- 2002-06-03 I am sooo productive. First, though, things to thank people for and grovel for, and I am so Tara's slave for, like, the MONTH. Tara Blue has very graciously volunteered to design the graphics for my site overhaul. Yes, THAT Tara, the one who did the amazing, beyond WORDS gorgeous Sleep While I Drive Bookcover, and since her email is now up there, everyone who told me they loved that pic, email her and say the same. I get inspired just LOOKING at it. Second, if you haven't been to check out Te's Graphics, you should do that. Some gorgeous Buffy things going on there. Not to mention Te's pic inspired by "A Handful of Dust". SOOOOO very Lex. *sighs* Now.... If you'll scroll down to the bottom left of the page, you will see a complete list (with links and hyperlinks!) of all my ficlets and WiPs and drafts as posted here. I went in and removed a couple of the stories I'd already posted to list (Spin, Outside In, etc), so this is pretty much everything else. I completely forgot about Metropolis and Damaged. Damaged just woke up a portion of my head I thought was asleep. Metropolis is clubfic, and Wendi's been sitting on me about continuing that one. *does happy dance* Also note, links right up top to the Clark/Lex email thing. Productive times two! I'm going to go be very, VERY smug now. Few things to add real fast.... More recs for the interested. Executive Training by Diana DeShaun. Fun fic. Definitely. Clark goes in with Lex to the office for a day. Both characters are simply wonderful. May Day by Basingstoke. PWP revels in the apple orchard. *g* Okay, so read it a few dozen times already. It's fun! Power Is in the Mouth by Basingstoke, which I will try to find a link to today. Sequel to Te's "Whosoever Loveth and Maketh a Lie", which is sequel to Basingstoke's "Five Things That Arent' True", which is one of the single trippiest stories in CREATION.... Anyway. Going to look, find, etc. Correct to my webpage rec page--I misattributed Witness Triptych to Basingstoke instead of the Spike. I think I have a Spike block. This is time two I've done this. *shakes head* It's--weird. But fixed as of this morning, unless I hallucinated the change, which is very possible. Other things. DevilDoll muses on the DDFH thing. For Beth's peace of mind, all my thoughts on the subject are locked in my LJ. I won't be commenting otherwise. Victoria muses on Criticism in fanfic at length. Can it be questioned why I love Victoria? *g* Here's the part that made me stop and go hmmm. Quote from article If you want help to make it better -- and I certainly applaud that -- then find a beta reader who is compatible, compassionate, sympathetic, understanding -- and puts it on the fridge. And make thaat the only person whose opinions you are willing to listen to. Victoria Again, I think this is reductive, and very dangerous to the new writer. There are lots of people out there who can help a beginning writer, if only the beginning writer is open to the idea that they might need help, and help is to be had. I agree so totally I actually feel the need to look for the apocalypse to begin. Right ON the money. Are the qualities listed in the article bad? No, those SHOULD be a given, especially the compatiability. However, the biggest thing I look for in any beta is the ability to be completely uninimidated by the concept of giving thorough critique, which frankly is VERY hard to find. No one wants to offend, so most people tred softly and forget to carry a big stick. It's annoying in extreme. Refusing to accept critique from other writers after the story is posted is--it makes no sense to me. I personally read it all, contemplate the problems stated, decide if there are problems, and discard what's unnecessary or that I don't agree with after careful reflection. That does not mean you should take every bit of critique to heart. It's all subjective. But if ten people write and totally miss the point you were trying to make in your story, there's this really really good chance you may not have done it quite as clearly as it could have been done. And let's face it--very few people are willing to send actual critique, good and bad, so when you get some, treasure it, treasure the person who sent it, and be thrilled. More later. jenn
email-- 4:29 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope Letter to Lex #3 -- 2002-06-03 Anwering Lex's latest email.... Dear Lex, I was wondering if you were okay--that was three entire days without a single email, and you're sort of regular about this sort of thing. But--good to know you're okay. The Wilson family is great--I mean, really great. I used to do some work for them in the summers before Dad needed me full time. It's funny that's who the assistant is, though, because that's who Saundra is staying with. Weird, huh? And Gabe seems like he's better--I saw him this morning during deliveries picking up some coffee. He does what you used to do, you know--buys for all of management and has it delivered to the plant. By the way, I met Saundra again for coffee at the Talon--she's been in Metropolis recently and was telling me about the city. I mean, I only go there for special occasions and stuff, but she lives there, and she's been really cool about telling me what it's like. She was at the gallery the night of the opening we went to, did you know that? You probably do, which makes me think you might know her or something. But anyway--we're meeting again in a couple of hours. She says she wants to absorb more local color and stuff. Pete thinks she's hot, so he's coming by after work. I'm beginning to think he's on a mission to date every girl that appears in town--he goes out *every* night. Oh yeah, Pete got a job with the local mayor's campaign. He puts things in envelopes all day. Okay, he *says* he's an assistant to the political director, but his talks with a lisp now and keeps drinking really cold drinks and says his mouth tastes bad all the time. He likes it, I think. Well, he complains less than you do, anyway. And Chloe would, like, move *into* the Ledger's basement if they let her. I'm not totally convinced she hasn't already--the only time I've seen her in the last couple of days were by accident at the Talon when she was picking up coffee. We're supposed to go to a movie on Friday, but I may have to sedate her or something to get her to come along. Not as much fun that way. And--okay, it's odd, but I went to Church on Sunday with Mom and Dad. Sort of in relation to the entire religion discussion, I guess. I mean, I haven't gone for a long time, but I was thinking about you and decided to go. We're not great goers, you know, though I was confirmed and all that when I was younger. It was nice and kind of boring, and I won't tell you that I had some really weirdly inappropriate thoughts. But Reverend Kirkpatrick's sermon on mortal sins made me listen, and as far as I can tell, I think you're okay with the praying thing. I'm not really religious myself. I mean, dad and mom are, but I never--felt it. They always say that God sent me to them, but that's kinda ironic on some level. But--that higher power thing? I---do feel that, if that makes sense. Probably doesn't, but I guess everyone feels that way about their spiritual side. It's just-- Okay, I'm giving myself a headache, so let's talk about that another day. You know, when you move on to Baptist ministers or something. *smiles* You know, you've been back in the city for eight weeks. I know you aren't that busy and it's only three hours--I mean, you drove longer than that to get pizza one night. I'd think you were avoiding Smallville, except you said that you learned that people have to face their fears and all that. Not that I think you're afraid of Smallville or anything. Okay, gotta wrap this up, I've got to meet Saundra in fifteen minutes. I miss you. Clark ***** Tag, Te email-- 1:10 p.m. The only size six Michael Rosenbaum is getting into is the one on his date. - by Hope |
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